I have never been it Iceland before, though I am sure it is a nice enough place. I mean, its not like the sort of place where old men would beat the crap out of each other in an assisted living place to lay claim to a copy of the current Ram Semen Guide…right? Because that would be fucking ludicrous.
It would seem that they do have this problem.
What the hump??? Check it out here: http://icelandreview.com/icelandreview/daily_news/Fight_over_Ram_Insemination_Book_at_Elderly_Homes_0_404303.news.aspx
Maybe I’m missing something here. Is Ram jizz the Icelandic equivalent to Justin Bieber? Remember Beatlemania? Is it like that but instead of the Beatles it is a pint of sheep squirt? Why are there not enough copies of this, evidently all important, manuscript. If Gramps is willing to smack the dentures out of somebodies mouth for the secrets of wooly spunk, would you not think it to be smart to have provided more than one fucking copy of this book to the Old Folks home.
“Hey Billy…have you seen Mrs November yet?”
“Nahhh…fuck that shit…I got the only copy of this years Ram Slam.”
“Hey let me see that a second Billy”
“Suck my wrinkly ball bag”
“Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck yoooooooooooooooooooouuuu Billllllllllly”
–insert elderly fight to the death here—
I have not been old yet, but I know old people. I am relatively sure that this is not common old folk practices, so it must be an Iceland thing. The worst part about it is that the article said that of the 47 types of ram goo you can get, none of them seem to stand out more than the others. Why bother?
You can get the semen from special sheep stations. I wonder if it works like pick a part for cars, where you chase down a ram..tackle him, and spank him off into a mason jar. That could almost become a winter olympic sport. It probably has not only due to the fact that Iceland would win the fucking gold every year. Of course…we do have Florida…maybe we could grab silver.
I guess in the great Icelandic spank race for ram spunk…it does not pay to be sheepish.
—Like this post? Share it with others and help build the Froth Army. Don’t forget to leave a comment and subscribe so you don’t miss any future frothy goodness.—